March 2012
57 posts
2 tags
Strings.
I learned to play your favourite song. The one you used to sing to me with a smile on your face. I played all the notes until my hands were cramped still, and when I couldn’t play anymore, I studied all the nuances between the notes. The spacing, the timing and the reasons why. You never complained about my callous hands when I stroked your softness and whispered the lyrics somewhere in the...
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Spinal Architect.
Creating discs of platinum so you can stand tall my structure is central to your fortitude impenetrable protection for your nervous system everything flows through what I’ve made for you But soon I’ll grow tired of the you that I’ve designed rearrange the vertebrae until you’re something new grant you strength and power or take it away from you play God with...
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I am softly spoken words that never leave my lips bouncing back off my teeth a pulse in the sonar echoing back inside me never dreaming of the sun the sound of my own voice is all that’s ringing in my ears.
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Plated.
I’m leather and black metal absorbing sunlight as it touches me I am the walking darkness neon advertisements for men’s designer labels hold none of their reflections against my tattooed skin bullet belts and chains I’m death metal and spikes that puncture your ideals of what a man is supposed to be I am the thorn in your eye you stare but you don’t see that you’re...
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Self Less.
The mirror has tears and hands pressed to glass I can hear him begging me falling down to his knees with his head hung low and he’s starting to crack fractures in his spine his eyes, staring into mine Forgive me Forgive me, not Forgive me Not.
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Free Speech for the Dumb.
“Change the channel.”
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Free Speech for the Dumb.
“Credit, thanks.”
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The Girl Who Has Nobody.
Why is it always you? You, who crawls on bloodied elbows, digging up the pieces of lost causes. I have watched you down there, trying to understand why you let yourself become infected by the dirt that gets inside your blood stream. I wonder if anyone is there to put band-aids on your skinned knees, if anyone’s shoulders are damp with your tears. If you think you can be my life support, I...
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Survivalism.
I got my new high definition, 3-D television today. With a sound system loud enough to put a hole in the world. Ten thousand dollars is a fair price for five bucks worth of electronics and a dollar for labour. I sit on my leather lounge, in my Calvin Klein underwear. I needed to buy this TV. I didn’t even know I needed it until I saw it. Then, I couldn’t live with out. I would have...
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Puppy Love.
They wrote letters and walked together whilst holding hands and he picked flowers to put in her hair that she twirled when he whispered his love to her ear When he walked with someone else she told them all she wanted to die they said it wasn’t real that she was too young but when she killed herself they called it true love.
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Rocket Fuel.
The sun hurts this morning. It blinds and burns my feverish skin. I’m drying out, my hands are shaking, and my skin is being taken from me one small, white flake at a time. The ground trembles as spiders and vinegaroons play pulsing drums inside my temples. Torturing me with repetition. Air conditioning does nothing but help the heat pump my stomach into the back of my throat. I run to the...
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Writing.
At Noelle’s request, I thought I’d share a thought or two on this little writing community thing we’ve got going on here. I have never directly addressed the topic, but I have done commentaries on elements of it here, here and here. I’m a writer. When people ask what I do creatively, among music and photography, the first thing I tell them is that I’m a writer....
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Angels Above, Demons Below.
My wings are ashen membranes torn bone structured the span, battle worn Speaking in hellfire with tongues made for curses the answers for demons always make you nervous But I still ascend the sky is my kingdom people look up at my flight not realising what is in them I have always known how but never known why if someone like me has wings then any one can fly.
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Belonging.
They wrote each other every day, distance was no obstacle. He couldn’t remember what breathing was like before he met her. Every molecule of air was put to use as he inhaled deeply. Invigorated and safe. A place he’d never been before. She was fulfilled by him in ways that had always been lacking. She knew what she wanted and needed and he provided both. He was flawed, as was she, and...
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Track.
Shallow creek in a deep gully sculpted valleys we hunt between step lightly like the fox along the bank silently moving and still the water flows it knows the way you chose to go.
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Fucking Dying.
Fuck me up. Fuck me inside out. I didn’t even know I was bending to you until I broke apart. Placed into boots that never fit. I am anaemic bruises that bled on impact. Weak walled red blood cells that go burst in the night. Love me, hate me, I am inside you, and cum doesn’t wash out so easy. I know, I put my tongue between your thighs, tasting all you couldn’t bear the thought...
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Weak.
I forget how much you need the leash they put around your neck tell me you hate it but never pull too hard against it or you might get free I know how much you love the noose they put around your neck it’s an easy excuse you can depend on because you’ll die if you try to leave.
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“Most people are only players because they got played, and have not let go of...”
– Immortal Technique - Reverse Pimpology.
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You're Here, Too.
Holding my dreams in your long fingers with a subtle smile kissing them goodbye before blowing them through me Your dark hair and eyes that match with lips so soft I often wonder how my name sounds when you exhale it.
“It really gets inside the mind of an internal fifteen year old. If you ever lose...”
– Bruce Dickinson on metal music and growing up.
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Smack.
I’m a six foot four abortion, one of God’s unwanted children. Cast down from the heavens without ever having wings and questioning the need for them to begin with. I’m the enemy of huddled masses as I set fire to those who are cold. The flash of faces that you dream about after your memory has been erased with his words ringing in your ears. “Damn you, child.”...
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“Understand that we’re fighting a war we can’t win. They hate us, we...”
– Henry Rollins, Black Flag - Police Story.
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Growing Pains.
We turned over the soil with our bare hands painstakingly slow we planted the seeds to allow us to grow from something small barely a concept now we are in bloom Watch me grow our roots entangled through the dirt deep under the earth we thrive in the sun and shed old petals like tear drops that photosynthesise.
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Never change a thing, or hide any part of you, who’d ever want that?
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Stripped.
I’m wandering on broken ankles crawling away on bloodied knees too low to the ground to cast any shadow shedding all the pieces I don’t really need Ain’t it something, to be nothing? Devolved, single celled slipping through chains a one track mind heading for freedom not lonely, just alone you waved goodbye I had nothing to lose until I lost you I used to be...
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Bad JuJu.
It was a hot night. Fucking hot. The singer had a moustache. Well groomed, very stylish and super cool. A dapper, three-piece suit and a fob watch chain. Vocal cords soaked and starched in countless whiskey sevens. No ice. It wouldn’t’ve lasted long anyway. None of this was out of place for a blues and rockabilly show. Except the singer was a girl. Hollerin’, cussin’,...
I lost my conscience
but I found my soul
holding my breath
in cheap whiskey.
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As The Grave.
Middle fingers can be removed at the knuckle. Malcontent tongues can be cut out. Eyes can be burned blind with mace. Independent thought can be beaten out by riot batons. Ears can be deafened with the truth. Feelings can be numbed by reality TV. Loved ones can disappear under black hoods. Identities can be erased. Life spans can be shortened. Your existence can cease. Silence is achieved through...
I don’t like dreams
hopes and wishes
unfulfilled today
that will remain
the same at dawn
Sleep is a curse
because tomorrow
is just another day
that I don’t want
to wake up to.
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Unconditional.
I struggle to see myself in a better light. But when you are the mirror I reflect myself upon, it’s no wonder I never measure up. Your non-existence is the bane of mine. All you need to do is be here, but you won’t. I’ve never asked you for anything and yet I am your biggest burden. I inherited your crooked smile and I can’t help thinking what else is embedded between...
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I’m an intricate clockwork of delicate moving parts constantly ticking away until absolute zero the only thing that matters is using all the time I have only as finite as the limitations that I’ve made for myself standing still isn’t possible keep on running faster to stay ahead of the arms that always control me.
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Open.
They’re all broken hearted, that’s the way I like them. I try to play the hero and swoop in and save the day, gathering shards and slivers and holding them in my hands until the owner is ready to re-insert them back inside their chest. Safe in my embrace, they let it all go. I willingly accept all the pieces that have been made so by the bastards who came before me, who took hammer and...
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Hipsters and Their Indoor Sunglasses.
She told me I had an infinite sadness because she saw it on some fucking 90’s album cover. She told me looking into my eyes while I spoke was like conversing with Cobain. I told her to fuck off.
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Trinity.
I didn’t even know I had a soul until I felt I was losing it. Heart, mind and spirit are three separate entities that claim ownership over the flesh they hover above. They swirl and twist and run through me. They are tempered blades in endless conflict with each other, forever battling to wound and puncture. Never to kill. They enjoy watching each other suffer, all blissfully unaware that I,...
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Love The Pain.
If you jump I’ll follow you if you cut I’ll bleed with you if you starve I’ll fast with you if you fuck I’ll come with you if you smoke I’ll choke with you if you drink I’ll throw up with you if you get high I’ll come down with you if you die I wanna die with you.
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Fallout Blonde.
She was the blonde at the end of the world. Did she cause it? I do not know. But when she spoke, you could not ignore the thoughts crawling slowly over the crest of your brain that she had accurate and exact knowledge of why we died. How we lost our way. She was the only person left with the secrets from the old world. Her eyes revealed nothing other than the fact that she had seen everything....
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How To Ruin Your Life
milajaroniec:
Get stuck. Stay in one place your whole life. Always order vanilla even though the menu is four pages long. Become the type of person who sends back lattes. Save up your money for a plasma TV instead of a plane ticket. Talk a lot about things you know nothing about. Have an affair with someone you don’t even find attractive.
Refuse to forget your ex. Make it impossible for...
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Save Me.
I didn’t die for anyone’s sins
I was scared and alone
and when you drove the nails in
I took my father’s name in vain
you persecuted me for love
you demonised me for equality
so why the fuck would you think
I’d sacrifice my life for any of you? Beyond hope, beyond redemption
seeking answers, I got the suggestion
harness all of your natural aggression
and fucking...
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Floral.
The grass is green as Spring, as we lay in the shade beneath a camphor. The gardenia I had picked for her nestled comfortably in her hair, the scent swirling with the breeze. The sun bore orange tunnels through the the thick canopy, the streams of dusk light swaying lazily back and forth as the leaves rustled. They would rather rest, I think. They would have envied us. I inhaled her deeply, hoping...
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I Will Not Teach Others How To Fly.
A finger held to lips
to silence independence
free thinking is contagious
so keep it to yourself
don’t ask anything
that I cannot answer
just accept your fate
middle class mediocrity Thinking is dangerous
it could make you dream
that you deserve more
than the life of a slave
so keep your mouth shut
or the others might hear
where would any of us be
if we all were free?